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The Role of the Best Man

Duties of a Bestman:

The Best man is the chief assistant to the groom at a wedding and (along with the Maid of Honour). The groom extends this honour to someone who is close to him, generally close friend or relative. When the groom wishes to give this honour to a woman, she may be termed the best woman or best person. The bride’s equivalent of the best man is the Maid of Honour. Again, if this honouree is male, he may be called a “Man of Honour”.

The main duties of the best man on the day of a wedding would be:

  • Assist the groom on the wedding day, get him to the ceremony 30 minutes before the time
  • Act confident for the groom as he might have pre-wedding nerves
  • Be in charge of the ushers
  • Keep the wedding rings safe until needed during the ceremony
  • Stand next to the groom during the ceremony
  • Act as a legal witness to the marriage and therefore sign the marriage certificate
  • Prepare a "best man's speech" to be read at the reception
  • Pay the officiant, Singers and musicians
  • Help gather guests for photographs
  • Pay the band, photographer, DJ, any other suppliers
  • Take care of the wedding cards on the day if required

He would also plan the stag party for the groom; assist with luggage or gifts or unexpected complications. They may also decorate the newlywed couples’ car.
Attend Suit fittings, attend the wedding rehearsal and buy a wedding gift for the couple.

Bestman Speeches:

You only get one chance to give your speech so don’t blow it! There is no doubt, speeches can be tough and the best man’s speech is expected to be one of the highlights of the wedding.  The best man is normally the last of the speakers and will usually open his speech by welcoming all of the guests to the wedding, introduce himself. He usually mentions how he got to know the groom, recall a couple of memorable stories about his past. The best man is sometimes under pressure to be funny and witty but really the secret is to have a short speech.

The following may help you if you are going to be the best man in the near future:

  • Thank the groom
  • Toast the bridesmaids and say how beautiful they look
  • Thank both sets of parents for their kind words
  • Compliment the groom on his excellent choice of bride
  • Compliment the bride on how beautiful she looks on her wedding day
  • The speech should be no longer than six minutes to keep it short & sweet & to the point
  • Do not get your speech from the internet
  • Remember there will be older relatives present, so best to keep your speech appropriate
  • Do not mention past relationships or stag party events
  • Be yourself, don’t drink too much!
  • Toast the Bride and Groom

Tip of the Week:

Jot down a few keywords for your speech. Have little cards rather than a long page.
The secret is to begin your speech in a sincere manner, be funny in the middle, sincere again at the end.
Encourage your speakers not to hit the bar too early: a tipsy toaster will be on the verge of sharing too much. The speech should be no more than 6-8 minutes; any shorter they may think you didn’t put enough thought into it and any longer, you may lose their interest. Short and Sweet.

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